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Managing Emotions and Arthritis

Learn how to manage the emotions you may experience when dealing with a chronic condition like arthritis.

Emotions that come along with the pain, fatigue and other physical symptoms of arthritis can be surprising and even overwhelming. It’s natural and understandable for people with arthritis to experience an ebb and flow of resilience and anxiety. Your life stage, self-image, relationships, responsibilities, economic security and disease status will affect your emotions as you manage your disease.

The Emotional Journey

“The ways we react to crisis are highly individual and varied. You may experience a range of many – sometimes contradictory – emotions simultaneously,” says Kenneth J. Doka, PhD, professor of psychology and counseling at the College of New Rochelle in New York.


Some emotions you may encounter during your journey living with arthritis include:

Shock

You feel surprised at receiving a diagnosis of a chronic disease.

Relief

You feel somewhat eased that you have an explanation for those mysterious symptoms.

Confusion

You are unsure what the diagnosis means. What will the future hold? What do you have to do next?

Overwhelm

There’s too much to think about and deal with! Doctor’s appointments, physical therapy, medicine, work, family.

Anger

You’re mad because aspects of your life have changed. You may feel angry at yourself for being ill, at others for not “fixing” it or giving you more support, or at a higher power for “letting this happen to you.”

Frustration

You feel frustrated because of your persistent pain, reduced abilities and loss of control over life.

Anxiety and fear

You may be scared for the present and for what arthritis may bring in the future. This can be especially true if you’ve known someone who had severe arthritis.

Loss

You may feel a sense of loss over the life you planned, or loss for things you can’t do anymore.

Isolation

You may feel isolated and detached from your family, friends and community when you can’t participate in the same way you used to.

Helplessness

You may feel helpless if you have to start relying on others to do things you used to do on your own.

Guilt

You may feel bad if you can’t “pull your weight” around the house or on the job due to pain and fatigue.

Jealousy or resentment

You may resent of feel jealous of your friends or family members who can do things you want to be able to do.

Embarrassment

You may feel embarrassed if you limp or have to ask for help opening a jar. You don’t want to draw attention to yourself and your reduced abilities.

Shame

You could feel shame if you knew the extra weight you were carrying was bad for your knees, but didn’t heed the doctor’s advice to lose weight.

Irritability

All that pain, fatigue, frustration and anxiety can make you irritable.

Stress and tension

Physical, financial, relationship and self-image challenges can cause you to feel tense and stressed.

Sadness

You may feel low because of what you’re dealing with and for what you have lost. If your blues last for more than two weeks or disrupt your life, you may be dealing with depression and should seek help and support.

Depression

You experience a range of emotions that are debilitating and affect your ability to function.

Fostering Emotional Wellbeing

These emotions don’t stand alone. Your mind and body are closely linked. Your physical symptoms will influence the feelings you experience. And your emotions can change the way you perceive physical symptoms, and make them worse. For example, if you’re in pain you may become short-tempered or withdraw from friends and family. On the other hand, focusing on something good in your life can make your aches and pains easier to cope with. That’s why caring for your emotional health is a critical part of a comprehensive treatment plan.


There are steps you can take to improve your emotional wellbeing, including:

  • Working with your doctor to get your disease under control and minimize medication side effects is an important first step.  
  • Doing what you can to keep negative emotions at bay through physical and emotional self-care. Some self-care options include mind-body practices, music and art therapy, exercise, a healthful diet, massage, and activity pacing. 
  • Getting involved in social activities to prevent feelings of isolation and find outlets for laughter and play.
  • Seeking out professional counseling or an arthritis-specific support group can give you an outlet to talk about your emotions and provide you with coping mechanisms. 

Doka recommends, “Nurture the strengths you’ve always had. Look back on how you’ve handled crises before and ask yourself how that can be useful to me now.” He says to ask yourself these questions: 
What are some personal resources I have? 

  • How does my faith speak to me? 
  • Who do I know who’s very supportive? 
  • Who can I talk to?”

No matter where you are with your emotional journey with arthritis, you do have many options for managing your physical and emotional wellbeing. Remember that you aren’t alone in your feelings and keep these strategies in mind when you need help coping with pain and emotions. 

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